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Right now, I am in love with the concept of 'somebody else's problem'. Today was my last day at work, at least for now - much as I hate to think about it, I'll probably be back next summer.

But for now, everything becomes somebody else's problem. Scuba class running ten minutes past closing? Somebody else's problem! Used bandaids on the deck? Somebody else's problem! Pool vac broken again? Someobdy else's problem!

I had some awesome co-workers, and a string of awesome bosses, but I am so happy I'm not going to be seeing that place for at least another eight months or so. Three years was way too much.

*sigh* Having another moment of late-night indecision, although this time about my chosen field of study rather than where I'm going. And I know it's stupid to get worked up about - I can name several people off-hand who have jobs they love in careers totally unrelated to their undergrad degree. I guess it's just...I'm afraid of not being good enough at science to make it. I already had to be honest with myself and admit that while I love costume/fashion design, and graphic design, I am and probably will never be anywhere near good enough to make it my life. And that hurt, and I'm afraid everything I try to do will turn out that way.

Ugh. Am going to try getting to sleep some more, because I know I'll feel better afterwards.

It will be a cold day in hell when I can actually draw noses okay. They give me a strangely huge amount of trouble - I can't draw hands or feet that well either, but there you can futz with poses or cut them out of the picture or whatever. Noses are right there. It doesn't help that my style is some weird simplified thin in-between realism and anime/manga style - not enough shading to do more realistic noses, but anime-style noses look off.

And Asher, I love your bangs dearly, but they are a bitch to draw. Oh well. At least the muscles on this look pretty good. And mmm, shirtless!Asher.

Something of a continuation of last night's post. I realized I forgot to mention something that amused me at work yesterday. There was a big end-of-summer party for all the members at the outdoor pool, so there was food and music and tons of people. So I'm sitting around the kiddie pool, contemplating some Isaac/Raphael stuff that may eventually get typed up, when 'YMCA' comes on over the sound system. This was amusing on two fronts - one, the overwhelming gay of that song, and two, the fact that my place of employment is like the YMCA except for richer, and overwhelmingly Jewish. We're the Jewish YMCA, pretty much.

Oh, and I realized that not everyone got the flash video reference I made last posts, so here's a link. Now imagine Futomimi sounding like the Russians there (everyone other than the three SMT fans reading this, substitute stern glaring man of your choice - Nagare or Tezuka, for instance - to get the same effect).

Also, I crave Hamlet/Horatio and Dante/Virgil (or Virgil/Dante, I really don't know who tops there). There needs to be more fic for both these pairings! Particularly stuff that isn't written by me for D/V.

And now, photo time! Mostly of where I work, because I think Jo and Grace are the only two of my friends to have ever been inside, although with two of me and my newly finished waistcoat

( w00t )

+++ Divide By Cucumber Error. Please Reinstall Universe And Reboot +++

(I've hit that point of lack of sleep past being moody to where everything seems amusing an happy)

For my Canadian friends - how easy is it to find a cheap tv out there? Doesn't have to be huge or a flat-screen or anything, although it does have to have A/V jacks and not be like...10". The cheapest I can find poking around online is $80 new for a small CRT, but I have no idea what used prices or like or even where one would find a used tv. I've got a 14" CRT here I could concievably bring, but it's really bulky and will require me bringing another box just for it, pretty much. But at the same time, I'm not sure if I'm going to have a hundred bucks to drop on a tv (thanks, Air Canada ><).

I feel so mixed up right now, emotionally. And I've probably been posting way too much vaguely emo introspective shit lately, but...it helps me to get it out there.

I really am such a screw-up sometimes, when it comes to relationships - both the romantic and the platonic. And no, I don't really want to explain further, unless you're Winter or Mara.

EDIT: Bejeweled is calming. Which is good, because it means I won't lay awake feeling utterly miserable.

Largely, the fact that I am pale and English and have great big round eyes is an advantage in cosplay, because so many video game and anime characters do not look Japanese or even just generally asian in the least (even the ones that are supposed to be Japanese). However, this means I am totally and completely screwed when it comes to characters who look at all asian. Like Roy. Or Tseng (this is why I'm planning on Rufus instead). Or, at the moment, the demi-fiend. Yes, I am weak. It's the tattoos, because they are freakin' awesome.

I do find it amusing that there are a number of things I can do about the fact the demi-fiend in shirtless and I am a 38B, but not about the fact that he's Japanese. Because yeah, already tried fixing that for Roy last year. Mostly just made me look kind of silly, which is why I don't post those photos anywhere.

I've discovered that much as KMFDM makes really good DMC background music, VNV Nation makes really good Nocturne background music. 'Kingdom' even has lyrics that largely work.

Have to say though...damn, is the second kalpa hard. Both for some of the enemies, and for the room of infuriating madness (the one with all the invisible walls).

And I feel like drawing, but I suspect that it'll all come out crap at the moment. May try anyway, or do some outfit designs, as those don't need really excellent anatomy or anything.

...To Jo!

Happy Birthday!

And now, back to my flute-playing :D

EDIT: It is somehow deeply comforting to be able to pick up my flute after almost two years of not playing, and still be able to do the simplified line of Ode to Joy from memory.